mymichele's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I shaved my legs for this? I am currently munching on Taco Cabana. It is some good stuff. (Burp) I went to see Americas Sweethearts and Shrek today. I liked both of them, but I liked Shrek more than the other. It was good times, yes. (Burp) I'm a little conflicted today. Why? BB is really intelligent. He skipped 2 grades in school, has a 4.0 GPA, has a genius IQ, and all that crap. The problem with really smart people is that they tend to overanalyze everything, and when they do that, they come up with their own fucked up logic. He has always had some kind of strange logic, ever since I met him. For some reason, he's a virgin, but he'll do "anything but." When we first got together, he explained to me that he doesn't want a girlfriend until he knows he wants to marry the person, and until then, he doesn't want comittment. I NEVER thought that was right. I've hated it from the very start. But that's the way he is, and if I want things to work, that's what I had to deal with. I don't want to go into everything "no comittment" can entail, but I'm sure you can imagine. Right now, my problem is that he refers to me with his friends as "the ex that I'm working things out with," because in his wacky ass logic, I am an ex. Last November, we "took it to the next level" and he finally, after three years, called me his girlfriend. Then, he decided it was too much, and demoted me back to our original title, whatever that is, in March. So, I'm not a good friend, I'm not a girlfriend, I'm not a life partner, I'm "the ex that I'm working things out with." That hurts. That's a bunch of shit. It really pisses me off. It makes me think I should end it now so I could really be his ex then. But how can I break up with someone when I was with him when he bought almost everything in his room? How can I break up with someone who knows me better than anyone ever has? How can I break up with someone who I've told almost every single detail of every part of my life for the past 4 years? He was there when I graduated from high school, he was there when I got accepted from college, he was there when I turned 18, when I turned 21, when my dog died, when my mom got married. He and I have been on trips to two different countries, almost every state in the US, he's spent Christmas with my family, and the list goes on and on. I don't know. I don't want to break up with him, I want to save this damn relationship and make it better. The only good thing about breaking up with him is the possibilty of a torrid love affair with Angel Boy, but that's probably not a good idea anyway. I just talked to my old roommate, and she rocks. Here for you is my list of former roommates! 1. Smoking Girl - she was my first roommate ever at my first college, and we weren't really matched well. She smoked, and made other friends at the "Smokers Pit" outside our dorm. We were both freshmen, but she got further into everything than I did. She didn't like me because I sat around and looked at porn all day, and because I was messy while she was pretty much a clean freak. This was not a good year. Fortunatly, she left during the second semester and I then had the room to myself. 2. Old girl - She was 37. I was 20. But she was pretty cool and had some good stories from when she was living in Taiwan. She moved out within the month she got here. 3. Japanese Girl - She was japanese, didn't speak much english, and the only conversation we had was about John Travolta. She only lived here for 2 months. 4.Chick Filet Girl - my last roommate, who was the only decent one in the bunch. We hung out socially, we went off our diets together, we stayed up talking until 3 AM, we fought about stuff, she was awesome. We even had the same first and middle name, which made things a little confusing. Okay, I'll shut up now. I just like making lists and stuff. I REALLY need to shave my legs. 7:49 p.m. - 2001-08-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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