mymichele's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Feelings for people who are dorks and other such things. Phhhttt. Weekends are so hard. They really are. I've had like.. 7 of them since this whole break-up thing started and they aren't getting any easier. Now Christmas is starting to depress me, too. First of all, I haven't even started shopping yet. Probably because it's like 80 degrees and it's hard to focus on the task at hand. And now I'm thinking about Christmas 2 or 3 years ago, where BB came to the pharme with us and we sat in the corner with my brother and made fun of everyone. A few days later we went to San Diego on a 2 week road trip. That was like.. the best days of our relationship. I'll never get those days back, and I'll never have days like those again. I miss him so much, and he won't even answer my pathetic "When are you going to ask me to come over?" email. I feel so pathetic. I still have 2 weekends left before I go to Austin, and I'm dreading them. Dreading them like crazy. I would rearrange my entire life if he just asked me to. I would lie to everyone I know if I had to, just to see him again. That's just me. That's who I am. I lived for him, and it's just so hard that he's living so easily without me now. Anyway. I just thought I'd share that. ***** This morning I was awakened by a 3 year old who told me, "It's time to wake up, come play airplane with me!" So I got out of bed and played airplane with him. The BL's son is just too cute, though. He definitely has grown on me, and I definitely have protective feelings for him now. He loves his puppy dogs and he is learning to have some really good manners, and I just know he's gonna be a good kid. Yay kids. I miss BB's roommate's daughter, someone I've known since she was barely 1 years old. But hey. Shit happens. ***** I was thinking about changing Dorkus Boy's name to something like Stud Boy or something, but then he said he stood in line for 12 hours to see the first showing of the Lord of the Rings, so I think we'll be keeping that name. I said to myself that I wouldn't say anything about this to anyone, but I never keep promises like that. I just wanted to say that for some reason, over the past couple of days I've kinda been fantasizing about what would happen if me and Dorkus Boy got together again. I mean, we both are total pervs, we have the same sense of humor, we went to both the same elementary school and high school.. I think it would be good times, don't you? But yeah. Moving to Austin probably wouldn't help that situation, so I haven't said a damn thing to him about it. Unless he reads this, which he is quite capable of doing so. But I don't think he does. Or something. ***** I'm talking to BB right now for some reason. He's telling me about his new girlfriend. He acts like he's just joking around, but perhaps he's not. But I'm just not going to worry about it. I'm just going to hang out with the 4 puppy dogs that reside at the farm, and I'm gonna be happy. Happy, damnit! ***** What was Mymichele doing a year ago? "I'm going to be in Florida for the next week, and after that, I'm going to Las Vegas. For a few days. To see Guns N Roses. Which is really just about my dream come true, but that's okay. So, really from Dec. 21-Jan 5th, there won't be much from me. Maybe I'll find a place to update, maybe not. I dunno. But Muah! So what I'm saying is that I won't be able to update for a while. I think me and my Diaryland addiction need this break. So don't forget about me the two weeks that I'm gone or I'll come to your house and throw mayonaisse on you." 6:16 p.m. - Friday, Dec. 20, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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