mymichele's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Drunken ramblings about some such or something Welcome to my drunken diary rantings.. woooee.. I've never written while partially drunk before. I haven't had anything to drink in like an hour or something and I was able to drive like across the street to my dorm so I think I'm okay, but then again, I might not be. Right now I'm feeling sorry for myself. I realized when I left that I could have probably left without telling anyone and nobody would have cared. And that sucks about my life. Nobody usually cares if I'm there or not. Sure, they'll talk to me if I am there, and we'll giggle, but no one seeks me out and no one gives a good god damn about anything. I've been telling everyone about my road trip (which has been made longer.. three weeks.. hot damn) and nobody cares! Why would anyone care! And I'm feeling bad because I should write for the paper next semester and further cultivate these friendships.. I would have time.. Tuesday and Thursday I only have like 2 classes and stuff.. but I have all these lame excuses, most of which start with "Well, I need my Fridays off in the fall because my boyfriend is obsessed with high school football and wouldn't ever let me forget it if I even missed one game to cover a concert." And I thought I didn't want to work there anymore, I really did, but the past couple of days have changed my mind. Sure it's stressfull and shit, but it's such a good experience for me. I apologize if I make no sense. I'm feeling sorry for myself. Because I had 2 Shiner Bocks, 2 Pina Coladas, and 2 shots. And normally, I have like none of that. And my editor.. I kept trying to be in the same room as him for some reason. It's not like I have a thing for him or anything. I even found out tonight that him and one of the photographer chicks have a thing going on! She was the most drunkest chick I've ever seen tonight and it was funny. But anyway, I kept trying to find him and follow him around or something, it was very strange. I left at 1:15, and as you might suspect, the party was still going strong. But I wasn't having fun anymore. And everyone else was having fun without me. Man, I really scrweed this college thing up. I should have had my priorities straight at th ebegging. That would have been a good thing. Instead, I spent all 4 years of school making tacos and watching Boston Public. Not that that's necessaily the worst thing I could have done, but you know, it certainly wasn't the best thing, either. This was my first college party and it was fun but it was dissapointing, too. I am not a cool person. I am not fun to hang out with. And I never will be, and that really sucks. The best part about the night was the note my editor gave me.. it was so sweet.. it really made my night. I'm gonna share it with you party people. It has a puppy dalmation on the cover and on the inside it says "Goodbye, you'll miss me." And then he wrote "Yeah, maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but you will. So its over now, and you survived the harsh gauntlet of the Daily. I'm so proud of you not just for your improved writing style, but also for your increaed confidence and ability to address complex issues. I can honestly say that you are completely different than you were when we first met.. enjoy it. Elizabeth, do take care. I hope to you that the real worl isn't as harsh as they say it is, but if it is, I know you can handle it." Man, that just makes me want to cry right now. I don't know if it's the Pina Colada or what, but that really touches me and makes me proud of me and him. I think I need to go to bed before I spread any more warmth. 1:15 a.m. - April 27, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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