mymichele's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Soundtrack - the break-up edition Okay, here's my soundtrack. This isn't finals week or anything. I don't have a statistics final tomorrow or anything. Really. This is a lot of songs, but they all remind me of my past relationships. Since I'm in a bit of a break-up funk, I thought it would be nice to tell you all about the songs that remind me of people. I took some songs off, and the rest of them all mean something to me. They're all important in their own ways. Later, when I'm out of this funk, I'll do a better soundtrack with only the most important songs on it. But here we go: SOUNDTRACK - THE BREAK UP EDITION MY ALL TIME FAVORITE SONG - Don't Cry, Guns N Roses. Why is this my favorite song? It's just beautiful. I love the video, cuz Stephanie Seymour gets knocked around. And the live version that I have a copy of.. I get chills when I hear it. I have a spiritual experience when I hear it. It's absolutely completely beautiful. "Baby, Maybe, Someday!" Somehow seems to describe my life. Aerosmith/Dream On - I first fell in love with this song when MTV had their 10 year anniversary. They played a live version of this that was absolutely incredible, with a full orchestra and everything. This song is what really made me fall in love with Aerosmith. Jann Arden/Insensitive - The first time I heard this song, I was hooked. I totally identify with it, always have. Especially the "I'm one of the chosen few who went ahead and fell for you..." I always feel like that when I have a new crush on someone or whatever. I'm kooky like that. Beethoven/Moonlight Sonata - I went through a phase during my senior year in high school where all the CD's I would buy were Beethoven. I bought so many Beethoven albums, it was completely ridiculous. Where are those CD's now? In the trash. In my car. Abandoned, like the whore I am. Bob Seger/We've Got Tonight - This was the theme of my prom in senior year. I didn't go to my prom. But this song became one of me and BB's songs, and I'm sure if I heard it anytime soon I'd collapse in the fetal position on the floor. We would hold hands whenever it came on. *sigh* Kenny Chesney/That's Why I'm Here - Okay, well, this is a long story. BB and I both really liked this song, and while it was popular, his best friend died in a drunk driving accident. It only made the song more real for him. He would listen to it on repeat, over and over and over. It made me so sad to see him like that. But it also made him swear off drinking, which is a good thing. Sheryl Crow/If It Makes You Happy - This was popular when I was dating Psycho Boy. "If it makes you happy, then why the hell are you so sad?" That's a question I'd ask myself a lot during the relationship. I was pretending that I was in a happy relationship when really I was in the most destructive relationship ever. Elton John ALWAYS will remind me of BB now. I used to like Elton on my own, but BB and his best friend like, worship the guy. We saw him life in Reno, and it was an incredible concert. Especially I Want Love and Original Sin.. I love both of those songs to pieces. Garbage/#1 Crush - Another Psycho Boy reminder. I would listen to this song 10 times in a row so I could write all the lyrics down and send them to Psycho Boy. That song is not a happy romantic song. It's a little obsessive. That pretty much describes our relationship. Goo Goo Dolls/Name - I love this song. It means something to me, but I don't know why. Jamie O'Neal/There is no Arizona - This isn't really a break-up song but I'm sure if I heard it anytime soon I'd hurt something. Me and BB loved this song so much. When we actually went to Arizona, we'd be all like "But there is no Arizona! No painted desert! No Sedona!" Oasis/Wonderwall - My boyfriend in 11th grade dedicated this song to me. That made me so happy because when I heard it for the first time, I was like, "Damn, I wish someone would dedicate this song to me." We went to the Oasis concert when they came to town. Good stuff. Pearl Jam/Black - This has always been one of my favorite songs. It gives me goosebumps whenever it comes on. Near the end of our time together, I got BB into it too. We both like the Staind version too. "And all I taught her was.. everything.." Limp Biskit/My Way - "Just one more fight about your leadership, and I will straight up leave your shit.." I feel it. This mostly describes me and Psycho Boy, but it can be used to describe everyone else too. Live/Turn my Head - - Ex Boyfriend (doofus boy) and online friend - Honestly, the only memory I have of this concert is the two guys I was with crying when "Turn My Head" came on. My ex, who I still had feelings for but he never quite had the same feelings because he was in love with his ex, he stared at the ring she gave him when they were still together, he played with it, and cried a little as well. The other guy cried because he was still in love with his ex too. I was like, "hello?" It was not pretty. Madonna/You'll See - A break-up song, yes, again. This time for Angel Boy. "You think I can't live without your love. You'll See." Yeah. I was feeling that. Faith Hill and Tim McGraw/It's Your Love - It was about a month into me and BB's relationship. I just told him that day that I thought I was in love with him. I was asleep, and he called me at like 2 AM and told me to turn on my TV to the country music station, and told me that this song made him think of me. It was one of the most romantic things he ever did for me. Sarah Mclachlan/Good Enough - "I never would have opened up but you seemed so real to me.." Sarah got me through a break-up way back when. I love me some Sarah. Meatloaf/Two Out of Three Ain't Bad - When me and BB first got together, he told me from the beginning that he could give me a lot, but he wasn't going to "fall in love" with me. To him, falling in love was like a sickness. He could love me, but he would never be "in love" with me. If that made sense. So, the song says "I want you, I need you, but there aint no way I'm ever gonna love you, but two out of three ain't bad." George Micheal/Father Figure, Faith, etc. - My brother used to love George Michael. He also loved his video camera. When I was like 8 years old, he had me and the rest of the neighborhood doing music videos for these songs. The tapes of this are totally hilarious. I was a real ham when I was 8. I was destined to be the movie star that I am now. Also, me and BB went through a George Michael phase. I bought him a CD for our one year anniversary. Therefore, George Michael will always remind me of BB. Bette Midler/The Rose - When she sang this at the concert I went to, I cried. She's beautiful, and she has a beautiful voice. It's this song, plus Axl of course, that is going to influence my rose tattoo, when I actually get the balls to get it. Alanis Morissette/You Oughta Know - I think Alanis corrupted the youth of America. That whole "Will she go down on you in a theater?" thing.. that put ideas in our heads. Ideas that we acted out on. Ideas that probably wouldn't have even occured to us if we hadn't heard the friggin song. Silly Alanis. Willie Nelson/City of New Orleans - Let me tell you something, folks. I love me some Willie Nelson. Maybe it's because I'm just a simple Texas girl, but Willie is my man. City of New Orleans is the song that BB would play before all our trips to Mardi Gras. Woop. The Nixons/Sister - I was in the front row of the Nixons on my 17th birthday, and they played this song, and it was just incredible. Yay Nixons. No Doubt/Don't Speak - A long story, but it's such a classic break-up song. Makes me think of Psycho Boy. Real Life/Send me an Angel - This was just a bonding song between me and Elementary School Best Friend. Yeeyuh. REM/Everybody Hurts - *sigh* Just like.. one of the most depressing songs of all time. Saliva/Always That particular song is the one that I identify with during this current break-up. "I love you, I hate you, I just can't live without you" is something I can really relate to at this point. Smashing Pumpkins/Dixie Chicks/Fleetwood Mac - Landslide - "I've been afraid of changing because I built my life around you.." It almost hurts to type that. It just describes every relationship I've been in. It was playing when BB and I got in one of our last big fights, and I decided I didn't like the song anymore. I've always built my life around everything but me, and that just isn't cool. It's not right. Def Leppard/Love Bites- When I was once on the phone with Angel Boy when we dated for the first time, the line was "I don't want to touch you too much baby, cuz making love to you might drive me crazy." He was listening to it while we were talking (which he always did.. he was a big music freak) and he sang those lines, and then he pointedly said "YEAH!" and I was like.. huh? Why did he say that? WHY WHY WHY! I dunno why, but it was cute and it made my 15 year old heart start beating like a whore on crack. Tonic/If You Could Only See - The Verve Pipe/The Freshman - K's Choice/I'm Not an Addict - all songs that were played non-stop when Psycho Boy and I were dating. I went to see all three of these bands when we broke up, they were on tour together. I had to leave early because it was too sad. Another song that should be in this category is Where Have All the Cowboys Gone by Paula Cole. All four of these songs.. if i could take 5 years off my life just to not hear any of these again, I would. Train/Drops of Jupiter - When we went on our East Coast road trip in 2001, I was thinking that BB was either going to break up with me or I'd have to break up with him. It became clear to me that he liked another girl, and I was soon going to be dumped. This song was on the radio every 5 minutes. This song made me sad because it seemed to me like he was asking her if, since she left him, she was happy. And I just identified with that. White Zombie/More Human than Human - this song will always remind me of Angel Boy, forever and ever. He loved White Zombie, he like.. worshipped White Zombie. I even bought a White Zombie shirt so I could be cool like him. He took the shirt from me, which I am still sad about. But I took his White Zombie hat and to this day, 7 years later, he still brings it up when I talk to him. Lee Ann Womack/Little Past Little Rock - This got me through the first break-up with BB in October of 99. Probably only because of the line "I had to leave my life in Dallas, that town will always be you.." But I listened to it over and over and it became a song of empowerment. GUNS N ROSES November Rain - It's a beautiful song and a beautiful video. When I got the CD, I heard this song for the first time and I was like.. wow. Such an awesome song. And then there was the video for it, and I was happy cuz everyone else got to share in the greatness that was November Rain. Also, my first boyfriend dedicated this to me, but since we only dated for like.. a month.. that wasn't really appropriate cuz the song isn't about new found love, it's about problems in a long term relationship. So yeeyuh. Patience - On his webpage, BB lists this song in his top 5 favorites. It wouldn't be in there if it wasn't for me. I'm listening to it right now and it makes me want to put a fork in my eye. At every live show, Axl sings "The lights, they shine so brighighighhht" and that always gets to me. My Michelle - Influenced my name over here at Diaryland. I don't really know why. I also don't know I chose to spell it the way I did. But it's a cool song, don't you think? Welcome to the Jungle - When I saw GN'R in Vegas, this was the first song. I was about to cry when this song started playing, and when Axl came out to a crowd of his biggest fans. It was a moment I will never forget. Yeeyuh. 3:25 p.m. - Monday, Dec. 09, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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